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　　蒋小姐，我理解你，我不会再来打扰你们。不过，希望你能满足一下我的好奇心：

　　当他向你坦白一切的时候，他是怎么评价我的？

　　他说－－你跟他完全属于不同的文化，他是一个彻头彻尾的中国人，而你是半中国半美国的hybrid(杂种，杂交)。他可以跟你上床，跟你做爱，接受你的按摩，但他不会爱你，更不会娶你做妻子。他的妻子，必须是一个纯洁的，温柔的，顺从的，夫唱妇随相夫教子的贤惠女性。

　　可是他－－他－他自己呢？他并不是一个彻头彻尾的中国人，他也美国化了，他－－有不止一个女朋友，同时的，脚踏两只船的－－

　　那仍然是中国文化。中国的性文化一向就是双重标准的，男人自己可以放肆，但女人不可以。你来美国太久，可能已经忘记了这一点。

　　我没有忘记这一点，但我以为他已经美国化了。

　　至少他在身高方面已经美国化了。

　　幽默！投蒋小姐一票。

　　一位参加了徐教授婚礼的美国朋友这样向我描述他的婚礼：

　　He had called a number of people and told them to be at his house Monday night. There were a lot of cars, maybe more than for New Year’s parties; most were Tai Ji people that I recognized, but some I later learned were from his university and other associations. Most people expected some sort of announcement, but only a few knew it concerned a fiancée, let alone that there would be a wedding ceremony. I was half an hour late and the ceremony had begun when I arrived. To the sounds of recorded wedding music, they walked into the living room with a minister between them, a man I did not know but was reputed to be a relative of one of his friends. Everyone gathered around, of course, many in complete surprise. It was a fairly conventional Christian service, complete with prayers led by the minister.

　　（他邀请了一些人，请他们周一去他家，门前很多车，可能比新年聚会时的车还多，我认出他们大多数是太极协会的人，还有些我后来才知道是他大学里的人和其他协会的人。很多人都认为他们会事先公布一下聚会的内容，但只有少数人知道是跟未婚妻有关的，没人想到是婚礼。我晚去了半小时，到那里的时候，婚礼已经开始了。录音机里放着婚礼音乐，一对新人来到客厅，他们中间是一个牧师，我不认识，据说是他某个朋友的亲戚。大家聚在新人周围，很多人都没料到是婚礼。那是一个相当基督教的婚礼，牧师领着大家为新人祷告。）

　　I was reluctant to go at first because I was afraid that I could not be completely joyous for them, knowing what I know about him and you, but I did OK. I would have expected parents of the bride and groom and other family members to be there, there will likely be a ceremony in China also. One of the strange things is that his bride is much taller and heavier than he is, maybe making two of him, but not really overweight, just big. The contrast was too large to ignore because I was one of the few people there that was taller than her. She seemed polite and friendly but still reserved, not saying a great deal. She is reasonably attractive, though certainly not to your degree. At first I wondered if she spoke English but I heard her speak very well, so she was probably just overwhelmed with so many new people.

　　（我开始是不怎么想去的，我知道你跟他的事，所以我觉得我去了也不会很开心，但我对婚礼感觉还不错。我以为新娘新郎的家人会出席婚礼，但没有，很可能他们在中国还要举行一个婚礼。有一件事很令我吃惊，新娘比新郎高，比新郎重，块头差不多有新郎两个大，两人对比太强烈，没人会注意不到，因为在场的人当中，像我一样比新娘高的没几个。新娘看上去很懂礼貌，很友好，但也很矜持，很少说话。她长相还比较吸引人，但比不上你。刚开始我不知道她会不会说英语，但后来听见她说英语了，说得很不错，所以她的沉默寡言大概是因为跟这么多陌生人在一起，有点不知所措。）

　　As Americans traditionally insist at any wedding, they kept wanting the couple to embrace, but that was clearly awkward for them, although I think she would have complied if Binsley was more relaxed with it. With time everyone will probably get to know her, but for now she is a polite stranger. I was favorably impressed that they did not let their size difference get in their way.